{"id":1374,"date":"2021-11-07T09:08:02","date_gmt":"2021-11-07T09:08:02","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.teamly.com\/blog\/?p=1374"},"modified":"2023-10-02T13:55:18","modified_gmt":"2023-10-02T13:55:18","slug":"rapport-building-activities","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.teamly.com\/blog\/rapport-building-activities\/","title":{"rendered":"25 Virtual and In-Person Rapport Activities to Build a Team With Moxie"},"content":{"rendered":"

Did it ever strike you as curious that Dorothy got along so well with a heartless Tin Man? Right from the start, she was enrapt\u2014oiling him, fixing him up, attending to him. You’d almost think she was in character, putting on an act.
\nCome to think of it, it’s just as unlikely that a lion would ingratiate himself almost immediately with the motley trio.<\/p>\n

Rapport, as a matter of course, generally doesn’t just happen. No, in the everyday world of teamwork and remote meetings, lions, young girls, scarecrows and tin men don’t effortlessly meld, lock arms and skip together down a yellow brick road.<\/p>\n

Open communication<\/a>, trust and esprit de corps within a team is the fruit of hard work and planning from a project manager.<\/p>\n

Creating this rapport is the foundation for solid work relationships. It creates a culture of empathy and mutual respect. Plus, it boosts company and individual work performance from good to exceptional.<\/p>\n

Many teams have lost the traditional framework for creating this camaraderie, as they have transitioned from in-person to remote working. Gone are the days of chatty repartee with the sports aficionados in the break room, or an impromptu coffee date with colleagues.<\/p>\n

A massive reshuffling within the workforce has also weakened team bonds.
\nThese changes call for leaders to double-down on their commitment to team building, and to creatively adjust traditional strategies.<\/p>\n

Let’s look at the cornerstones of rapport, illustrate some techniques for building it, and explain how it benefits us all. Finally, we’ll get into rapport building activities, both for in-person and remote teams.<\/p>\n

\"Cornerstones<\/p>\n

<\/span>The Cornerstones of Rapport<\/span><\/h2>\n

Have you ever been really concerned about knowing the dress code for an event you were attending?<\/p>\n

This is an effort to build rapport. We all know how jarring it feels to show up in a three piece suit to a gathering where everyone else has on t-shirts and sneakers.<\/p>\n

What is rapport, exactly?<\/p>\n

Rapport is about building connections with an individual or community. More than being friendly or getting on with another person, rapport seeks to break down barriers and enable fluid communication.<\/p>\n

Forensic psychologists Laurence and Emily Alison, authors of Rapport: the Four Ways to Read People, stress that rapport is the opposite of force.<\/p>\n

Rapport entails cooperation and acting out of freedom, while force compels action through fear, pressure, or enticement.<\/p>\n

Statements like \u201ceat your dinner or there won’t be any desert\u201d from a parent don’t serve to build rapport with a child.<\/p>\n

The Alisons have spent the past twenty years training the CIA and FBI to conduct interviews with criminals and terrorists.<\/p>\n

Through this hands-on experience, they have discovered key approaches and techniques to facilitate open communication. They have distilled the fundamental components of rapport into four areas: honesty, empathy, autonomy, and reflection (HEAR).<\/p>\n

Honesty<\/h3>\n

Have you ever had the experience where just after meeting someone, they say something you completely disagree with? Maybe they share a political opinion, or talk about loving a movie you absolutely loathe.<\/p>\n

It’s hard to know how to react in such a scenario.<\/p>\n

The honesty necessary for building rapport is like walking a tightrope. It entails not yielding your own position, while having flexibility for alternate perspectives.<\/p>\n

Reacting with complete honesty is a bit harsh. Saying something like: \u201cI completely disagree with you\u201d may well shut the other person down, or create an argument. Lines of communication are lost.<\/p>\n

Rather, the Alisons recommend softening the approach by pairing it with some empathy. Saying \u201cI see what you’re saying. However, as I see it…\u201d maintains honesty as well as a positive connection.<\/p>\n

Within teams, members build rapport when they incorporate empathy into their point of view. \u201cI know some people here don’t see it this way, but….\u201d<\/p>\n

\"Empathy\"<\/p>\n

Empathy<\/h3>\n

Empathy is integral to having rapport with someone. However, this quality doesn’t mean fluffy warmth or sentimental feelings.<\/p>\n

Empathizing with another person goes beyond thinking \u201cI know how I would feel if I were in their shoes\u201d, to really trying to understand another person’s perspective.<\/p>\n

This level of empathy is achieved through listening and an active imagination. It seeks to understand what really drives another person.<\/p>\n

Teams, as we know, are made up of people from all sorts of backgrounds, ages, personalities, and previous experiences. Releasing our own perspective and deliberately listening to others in order to get where they’re coming from is key to bridging communication gaps.<\/p>\n

Incorporating empathy<\/a> into difficult messages or bad news is necessary for maintaining rapport: \u201cI know the team feels overworked and needs a break, but this is a hard deadline we need to meet.\u201d<\/p>\n

Autonomy<\/h3>\n

Between these two statements, which do you think is more likely to get a four-year-old to cooperate: \u201cGo brush your teeth\u201d and \u201cWhat would you like to do first? Put on your pajamas or brush your teeth?\u201d<\/p>\n

Or these two, when approaching a customer service employee: \u201cI need you to fix this\u201d and \u201cWhat do you think you can do to fix this?\u201d<\/p>\n

Although each statement seeks the same end, there’s a world of difference between the approaches.<\/p>\n

At any age, we all want to have some liberty and license as to how we go about doing things.<\/p>\n

A work environment with lots of rigidity and protocol may well create totally unnecessary resistance from employees.<\/p>\n

Opening someone up and creating channels for communication and cooperation means pushing the right levers. Allowing for autonomy doesn’t erase any obligations. Rather, in whatever way possible, it seeks to provide people with choices and options.<\/p>\n

Giving people the flexibility as to what project to work on next, or when to do certain tasks, yields an obliging and cooperative team.<\/p>\n

\"Reflection\"<\/p>\n

Reflection<\/h3>\n

Have you ever heard that what people say are the icebergs that sit above the water? To get at what they really mean requires exploring beyond surface statements.<\/p>\n

In order to do this, the Alisons recommend a conversation technique of throwing back what a person has said. Statements like \u201cSo it sounds like what you’re saying\u201d, \u201cSo yeah, you’re kind of feeling like…\u201d and \u201cTell me what you mean by….\u201d generally compel people to explain themselves further.<\/p>\n

Rapport develops when a person feels they’re fully understood and listened to by another.<\/p>\n

Making a habit of using reflection statements at meetings builds rapport, as it allows people to fully explain themselves and be understood.<\/p>\n

Not So Easy as Pie<\/span><\/p>\n

There’s quite a lot that goes into building rapport, as you can see. It’s much more than making friendly banter.<\/p>\n

Fortunately, there are techniques to help facilitate an open, collaborative environment\u2014both within teams and in our personal lives.<\/p>\n

<\/span>Eight Hacks for Building Rapport<\/span><\/h2>\n

Career counselor Susan Callender<\/a> used to work up to seven days a week as the manager of a luxury hotel, completely immersed in a world of Persian rugs, velvet armchairs, and crystal chandeliers.<\/p>\n

She found herself carrying the demeanor of a formal hotel manager outside of work, and it would turn people off. It’s no wonder\u2014who wants to kick back and have a drink with someone who’s reserved, proper, and addresses you as \u201csir\u201d or \u201cmadam?\u201d<\/p>\n

Rapport is deliberate engagement. In order to connect in her various environments, Callender assumed her buttoned-up persona at the hotel, then found she had to deliberately let her hair down in her day-to-day life. It requires taking on roles and playing different versions of ourselves.<\/p>\n

It’s a skill we use anytime we interact with someone: our children, boss, coworkers, friends, and neighbors. Oftentimes we have only a small window to establish rapport, such as when we’re calling a customer service representative, talking to our mailman, or conducting interviews.<\/p>\n

Whatever the context, the principles of rapport still apply. Here are eight techniques for building rapport in everyday interactions.<\/p>\n

1. Speak with Body Language<\/h3>\n

You’ve probably heard that communication is 93% non-verbal.<\/p>\n

When engaging with someone, subtly imitating their body language is a way to establish a connection. When they cross their arms, cross yours. If their legs are crossed, do likewise.<\/p>\n

\"Speak<\/p>\n

Similarly, it’s important to be mindful of where people sit or stand in relation to one another.<\/p>\n

It feels casual to sit beside someone at a table, but more formal to sit across from them. Leaning forward in your chair, toward another, demonstrates interest and curiosity, while sitting back and taking up a lot of space communicates power.<\/p>\n

2. Be the Host With the Most or a Gracious Guest<\/h3>\n

Rapport is a little like playing human chess. It requires reading a situation, then taking on a role.<\/p>\n

Before going into a meeting or appointment, take some time understanding your relationship to everyone there.<\/p>\n

Hosting entails being the director of everything that is going on. It’s necessary to be attentive, welcoming, interested, and to do things that put others at ease.<\/p>\n

Playing the role of the guest, however, means showing up on time, being appreciative of the other person, and just generally going with the flow of whatever is happening.<\/p>\n

Assuming an appropriate role in social encounters allows engagement to function with ease.<\/p>\n

3. Create a Fostering Environment<\/h3>\n

How would you like to be interviewed by someone sitting across from you in a black swivel chair at an executive desk?<\/p>\n

An environment creates or destroys rapport. In order to have someone talk candidly about themselves, it\u2019s necessary to do things like graciously welcome them into the room, show them to the nicest chair, and ask about their day.<\/p>\n

4. Modulate Voice Tone<\/h3>\n

We all know to change the tone of our voice when talking to a three-year-old.
\nHowever, tone alteration isn’t so intuitive in many other interactions. It may not occur to a manger, who’s accustomed to speaking decisively with employees, to alter his or her tone when the dynamic shifts.<\/p>\n

However, this same tone of authority may not get them very far when asking to be upgraded to first class, or conducting an interview. A more diminutive tone is appropriate to these situations.<\/p>\n

Voice inflection is also important to consider when communicating. Raising your voice slightly at the end of a sentence indicates enthusiasm, whereas ending in a monotone indicates a lack of interest.<\/p>\n

5. Find Common Ground<\/h3>\n

When you have something in common with someone, it’s easy to chat away with them for hours.<\/p>\n

Establishing rapport in relationships and within teams can be as simple as discovering similar experiences, interests, and pastimes.<\/p>\n

\"Break<\/p>\n

6. Break Down Thin-Slicing<\/h3>\n

Sometimes we have just a small window to establish rapport and make the most of a situation.<\/p>\n

In his book Blink<\/em>, Malcom Gladwell introduces a concept he calls \u201cthin-slicing\u201d, which has to do with split second assumptions we make about each other that are based entirely on past experience.<\/p>\n

Overcoming false impressions and establishing rapport entails immediately presenting the story of who we are and how we want to be seen.<\/p>\n

Imagine a scenario where a woman is presenting to a group of people twice her age. In order to break down any assumptions they may have about her capabilities, she can immediately start with an anecdote that demonstrates her proficiency and knowledge with the subject at hand.<\/p>\n

7. Be Agreeable<\/h3>\n

When you have only a few minutes to build rapport, making a conscious effort to be agreeable goes a long way.<\/p>\n

If someone says they love tacos, go with it, even if you don’t. Mention the taco stand down the street, and your memories of eating tacos at tailgate parties in college. Congeniality generates a positive tone that allows conversation to flow.<\/p>\n

8. Adjust the Thermostat<\/h3>\n

Have you ever been so cold you had to turn up the thermostat, and then 45 minutes later you were taking off your sweater?<\/p>\n

Rapport develops through a variety of factors, all of which can be adjusted.
\nBuilding a friendly, open relationship requires constantly reading the temperature of a room and making tiny adjustments, if necessary.<\/p>\n

If you sense that someone is intimidated at a meeting, try lowering your chair. If you’ve overdressed for the occasion, take off your coat and roll up your sleeves. If you’re sensing resistance from team members, offer them flexibility on a deadline.<\/p>\n

Practice Makes Perfect<\/span><\/p>\n

Of course sitting in the wrong chair at a meeting isn’t going to make or break an interaction.<\/p>\n

However, fine tuning many details in concert creates an environment where enthusiasm builds, people feel heard, and communication flows.<\/p>\n

Achieving this end can be exhausting. Rapport is a soft skill that’s no cinch to master.<\/p>\n

But it’s well worth it, as the benefits play out both in our careers and personal lives as well.<\/p>\n

\"Who<\/p>\n

<\/span>Who Benefits from Rapport?<\/span><\/h2>\n

Teams with great rapport aren’t just having a lot of fun. Although there’s plenty of that to go around.<\/p>\n

Here are the top reasons having a united team and strong rapport skills means a win\u2014both for you personally and your team.<\/p>\n

A Team With Drive<\/h3>\n

A study from the University of Florida<\/a> found that teams who regularly engage in rapport building activities are more productive than those that don’t.<\/p>\n

Teams with solidarity are more likely to think outside of the box, and innovation increases. Sales and revenue goals are more easily met. Not a bad outcome, that.<\/p>\n

Company Culture Flourishes<\/h3>\n

Company culture<\/a> includes all the norms around the office–behaviors that are implicit but never stated outright. These unwritten rules affect how we relate to coworkers, clients, and conduct our everyday work.<\/p>\n

A team who’s built strong rapport naturally is full of empathy and enthusiasm. Habits of active listening, connecting, and supporting each other improve the everyday vibe of the office. People enjoy coming to work and being part of the team.<\/p>\n

Recruits Jibe With the Team<\/h3>\n

People with strong rapport skills know how to conduct a fruitful interview, where a prospective employee candidly shares his or her experiences, work habits, values and goals.<\/p>\n

Teams successfully identify candidates who align to the company’s core values and fit with the work ethic of the team.<\/p>\n

The Influencer<\/h3>\n

Someone who’s good at building rapport has an easier time finding consensus from a team, and can effectively sway others to his or her vision.<\/p>\n

\"The<\/p>\n

Windfalls Abound<\/h3>\n

Rapport is about the long-game. When you’ve set up a practice of being empathetic and establishing strong ties with people, they’ll do you a good turn when you need it.<\/p>\n

A Resume Skill<\/h3>\n

Your professional reputation, in large part, is the amount of social capital you amass–that is, the strength of the relationships you establish along the way.<\/p>\n

When businesses look to promote or hire, they want someone who interacts well with others. Rapport is a soft skill that employers prize in prospective employees.<\/p>\n

Bonds of Steel<\/h3>\n

When you know how to be empathetic and develop lines of communication, all of your relationships benefit.<\/p>\n

Rapport skills improve interactions with your teenager, your spouse, and help you persuade your stylist to squeeze you into her busy schedule.<\/p>\n

People Like You!<\/h3>\n

Last but certainly not least, anyone with strong rapport skills can gleefully squeal in unison with Sally Fields, \u201cAnd I can’t deny the fact that you LIKE me!\u201d
\nHow could anyone not, when you’re habitually warm, attentive, and listen well?<\/p>\n

A Bonafide Edge<\/span><\/p>\n

As you can see, rapport not only improves a work environment, but is a life skill that lubricates all the relationships in our lives.<\/p>\n

Now let’s get to the heart of the matter and look at activities for building rapport.<\/p>\n

<\/span>15 Virtual Rapport Building Activities<\/span><\/h2>\n

Virtual teams present a challenge to leaders. Gone are the days of water cooler banter and having a t\u00eate-\u00e0-t\u00eate with a colleague beside their desk. Creating cohesion and rapport requires thinking outside of the box.<\/p>\n

Many of these activities seek to recreate the office environment. Others increase empathy between teammates, while many are simply about having fun!<\/p>\n

Before the Meeting<\/h3>\n

The first five minutes of each meeting is usually spent waiting for everyone to show up, so why not use it for a little team building? Each of these activities takes five or ten minutes.<\/p>\n

1. Word Scramble<\/strong><\/h4>\n

Purpose<\/strong>: Fun<\/p>\n

Time<\/strong>: 5 minutes<\/p>\n

Frequency<\/strong>: Recurring<\/p>\n

Tools<\/strong>: Word Around Cards, video conference platform<\/p>\n

\"Word<\/p>\n

Word Around Cards look like a bull’s eye, and inside each ring is a scrambled word. The words increase in difficulty with each outer circle.<\/p>\n

The leader scans images of the cards beforehand, then presents them to the team, one by one. People either call out the answers, or enter them into chat.<\/p>\n

One variation on this game is holiday-themed word scrambles. Just write scrambled words like \u201cpumpkin\u201d and \u201cheadless horseman\u201d onto blank index cards, then scan them.<\/p>\n

2. \u201cI spy\u201d With the Background<\/strong><\/h4>\n

Purpose<\/strong>: Fun<\/p>\n

Time<\/strong>: 5 minutes<\/p>\n

Frequency<\/strong>: Recurring<\/p>\n

Tools<\/strong>: Video conference platform<\/p>\n

This game allows the team to have fun with each other’s background. One person names a characteristic of something he or she sees in another’s video background without saying what it is: \u201cI spy something that is green\u201d, \u201creminds me of my childhood\u201d or \u201csmells like a rose.\u201d<\/p>\n

The other team members take turns guessing what it is. Everyone takes a turn being \u201cit.\u201d<\/p>\n

\"Learn<\/p>\n

3. Learn a Foreign Word<\/strong><\/h4>\n

Purpose<\/strong>: Fun<\/p>\n

Time<\/strong>: 5 minutes<\/p>\n

Frequency<\/strong>: Recurring<\/p>\n

Tools<\/strong>: Video conference platform<\/p>\n

This is a great activity for international teams. One designated participant teaches a word from their mother tongue to everyone else. Slang or holiday-themed words make fun selections.<\/p>\n

4. Pre-Meeting Chat<\/strong><\/h4>\n

Purpose<\/strong>: Fun<\/p>\n

Time<\/strong>: 5-10 minutes<\/p>\n

Frequency<\/strong>: Recurring<\/p>\n

Tools<\/strong>: Video conference platform<\/p>\n

Simply designating the ten minutes before or after each meeting as a chat window allows members to catch up on one another’s lives.<\/p>\n

When done regularly, it becomes routine and people habitually join in.<\/p>\n

5. Trivia!<\/strong><\/h4>\n

Purpose<\/strong>: Fun<\/p>\n

Time<\/strong>: 10 minutes<\/p>\n

Frequency<\/strong>: Recurring<\/p>\n

Tools<\/strong>: Video conference platform and trivia questions<\/p>\n

Who doesn’t like a good game of trivia? Asking questions on current events from the past week keeps everyone on their toes.<\/p>\n

Answers can be shouted out or put into chat boxes.<\/p>\n

\"Quiz\"<\/p>\n

6. Cribs<\/strong><\/h4>\n

Purpose<\/strong>: Fun<\/p>\n

Time<\/strong>: 15 minutes<\/p>\n

Frequency<\/strong>: Recurring<\/p>\n

Tools<\/strong>: Video conference platform<\/p>\n

Working remotely allows team members a glimpse into the \u201creal\u201d you.<\/p>\n

At the beginning of a call, the leader asks one member to sign on with their phone, and provide the rest of the team with a selective tour of their domicile.<\/p>\n

It’s on the participant to choose what to reveal.<\/p>\n

This activity is an opportunity to show off the family’s refrigerator art, a collectible, or an heirloom they’re proud of.<\/p>\n

The team gets a peek into the lives of their coworkers that they’d never get to have in the office\u2014and probably discovers things they have in common, such as a passion for cooking or an LP record collection.<\/p>\n

Getting to Know the Team<\/h3>\n

With an increase in resignations and subsequent onboarding, it’s important to facilitate opportunities for team members to get to know everyone they’re working with.<\/p>\n

7. Manuel to Working With Me<\/strong><\/h4>\n

Purpose<\/strong>: Get to know me<\/p>\n

Time<\/strong>: 60 minutes<\/p>\n

Frequency<\/strong>: Once<\/p>\n

Tools<\/strong>: Video conference platform and Google docs<\/p>\n

Working remotely makes it impossible to understand each other’s working habits like we could at the office. In this project, participants share their work personalities and set the stage for trust and teamwork.<\/p>\n

For the first 30 minutes, participants answer questions related to their working style, preferences, and habits. Some questions might be:<\/p>\n